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Barbie: "Hmmph!  Who was that soldier kidding....."

"...he just wanted.......a......cheap......oh my!"

<insert typical airhead screaming here>

Barbie: "Ahhhhh! Nooooo!  I haven't finished my hair!!!!"

Narrator: "It's just like one of those bad horror flicks.  Instead of running out the door, the damsel in distress always runs upstairs where there's bound to be more monsters waiting"

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